feeling...

Peaceful right?

feeling... sharp. dangerous. full of attitude. which, I guess, is just what a girl about to go to college ought to feel like. When you, future Anna, get this, it'll be ten years from now, and the passport that you got today will have expired. How was going to school in another country? Was it far enough away from your parents? What prompted past-you to write this (besides the fact that the trusty sketchbook/journal has gone missing) is the fact that, among all of the suitcases you were looking for in the attic today, you also found a hefty dose of family history. History from 1840. A picture of the family goat. Hand drawn sketches of the cottage. Letters back and forth between two feuding families. One family claims its daughter was starved to death whilst visiting the other. The other family is outraged because of a false arrest upon an unfounded accusation of THEIR daughter being a member of a house of prostitution. All insults and accusations in flowery, minute, faint 1840's penmanship, of course. I don't even know what the point of this email is. I just think it's weird that on the eve of your departure to distance yourself from your family, just when you're feeling incredibly independent, the attic delivers. Now, past-you wants to stay connected, be Bess's great great great great granddaughter, add her own tale to the many family stories. Past-you wants to stay in the attic forever, reading the family history. But I guess that's why college is good. So you can get the hell out of that attic and this house and make your own history. Go on.

Epilogue

3 days later

Ten years ago, I was a senior in high school aching to go to college as far away from home as possible. I wanted to see other countries and make...

Nwo my tessrio. Was i,t idet ot sa — ot pndnale i i that rgyevhneit lantumnome aevle tbu hplfueo dna eohm ok eflt veen left. Aws inogpen berfeo em on ilke my tueurf swnig up ehitomsgn. .
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Anc owh i’ts teh yuo fuetru dipew vseli wt?ah scleo ubt oismeetsm dna wnko ywaa aiag,n be ondw uor rzacy cna. Baout hist hta,t oeebrf eriwtnt nswok i dleiv aws ,ellw nte ysera sonles 0022 wlle hte nnyaoe rtetel tyrtpe ttha daenrle aog tbu trfea tghrhou notmhs owh sah sxi. I — thwi dan my saw narecc oasnegdid rrhobet.
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Erhte ot guehon rtghi sahtt’ ltamso y,sa. Ecexienep,r hmcoe to siefihnd ihwt neev i ithw vtayeuelln wfe ni mih envre htguoh tog end fof ryesa eplh trfae gankit eht i a dan be gecelol aypclti nteh het. I som,rieme etaeadsdvt nyarot-ge-ea be ync,truo eenv or tngiaentd hnatero hewli ot ro otg pphya ni ym to ceglelo vreen cgole,le sefl icpyalt i eakm golleec ahtt if eb go d’i ldto. Maperdco that btu itnnogh gpe-leooclhe eht hte of i meos ssol of ym loss wkon erhbort pmosahruo to own si.
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Arye i erh yteepllcmo rneosp 81 tesiosmme fomr frdtfenei ym ta a efle abck ilke fesl oolk dol i adn. Xnistgei inegima v,rineues a ni i etnh aaplller of ubt tieuosd ehersmoew eitm reh. Riitnwg waay thta herte lfei ’eshs adn iigtnts hsti ni inatgwn ,odwrl oatub and gte reltte tatrs to hre. Nad and niot hyt’ree ofolr ecsoiko and neirgawnd tintigs nda hs’es wskla erh wno nhalggui mkngia eht on rnsfedi nda teeohrtg ucsmi dan obuta ,art nad nad tneh nowd ofr oo,mr ggoni jtus ’rebhrtos tklgina. Iwll fo nad leik hdlo atth eth dsniegnp ot noyl be ni buaot noen strtame eonnrhtr iaktngl cinaled tahn nte angktli neo on asdemr lhgist, ohw teh mteh eth flei illw eerhttgo ietm noe nwta ees go dya day ahtt ar,yse it tehor dan one to ,nwo to ’rheety orme mseerimo yeht evha ot itrhg uoatb grianzlei ngeo fo llwi not waht olok ot. Rfndei best asw my he.

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