feeling...

Peaceful right?

feeling... sharp. dangerous. full of attitude. which, I guess, is just what a girl about to go to college ought to feel like. When you, future Anna, get this, it'll be ten years from now, and the passport that you got today will have expired. How was going to school in another country? Was it far enough away from your parents? What prompted past-you to write this (besides the fact that the trusty sketchbook/journal has gone missing) is the fact that, among all of the suitcases you were looking for in the attic today, you also found a hefty dose of family history. History from 1840. A picture of the family goat. Hand drawn sketches of the cottage. Letters back and forth between two feuding families. One family claims its daughter was starved to death whilst visiting the other. The other family is outraged because of a false arrest upon an unfounded accusation of THEIR daughter being a member of a house of prostitution. All insults and accusations in flowery, minute, faint 1840's penmanship, of course. I don't even know what the point of this email is. I just think it's weird that on the eve of your departure to distance yourself from your family, just when you're feeling incredibly independent, the attic delivers. Now, past-you wants to stay connected, be Bess's great great great great granddaughter, add her own tale to the many family stories. Past-you wants to stay in the attic forever, reading the family history. But I guess that's why college is good. So you can get the hell out of that attic and this house and make your own history. Go on.

Epilogue

3 days later

Ten years ago, I was a senior in high school aching to go to college as far away from home as possible. I wanted to see other countries and make...

My won rtsiseo. Sa ftel elndnpa asw adn to — i etdi lfuheop ivneghreyt ok ,it i eomh tefl veela neev but naulonetmm to htat. Em was uufert gnwis lkei my emnhigtos nngoiep reoefb no pu. .
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Scole tub hwo iedwp rcyza wkno hte ownd si’t be whta? mtmsiesoe nca nad yuo sveli aawy aa,ign uor furuet acn. ,that ,wlle teyprt i taht 0202 ten knswo owh lsones ash hhrtoug serya ayonne teh utbao asw vdeil ewll tbu sxi sith broefe lrttee aog taref hmsont teintrw eanerld. — nad my itwh canrec aws nsagddoie i otbrreh.
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Oneuhg ot trhgi oslamt etreh as,y httas’. Envre i ikgatn mhi tnhe ni ehpl to tgo guhtho rtaef heocm enev i fof a het be ihtw telylnuvae wef henisdfi eht adn edn ayrse lcegelo alcpiyt htwi icepneee,rx. I tog orc,tnuy ro yciptal pahyp ittedgnna sem,roiem to evne llec,oge ym eevnr i raoethn if eb atht in go or ekma eolgecl dotl ayn-oe-rtega to flse oelelgc ’id weilh vadttsdeae eb. To fo i won l-hleogpeeco nowk bhetorr is tnhngio olss btu seom slso ym eht precoadm ttah of het puhasrmoo.
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Npesor 18 eikl erh i dtriffnee essomitem dlo rmfo eray dan oolk ym ta efel a bkac i oeltcpylme eslf. Item emginai a eohremswe tiixnsge rnsvu,eie todeusi llaplrea her utb i in of ethn. Hses’ iefl waay nad erhte get ihst erh uobta lor,dw wintigr that insttgi ntnwgia ni sattr adn lttere ot. Hre ’ertyeh lforo tino adn nda nagghilu enrwdgnai orf the and wklas sgniitt dan egethrto nad no inggo ownd fendrsi dna o,mor neht otbua ’hses dan t,ra adn aginkm umsci tujs ocsoeki rhetr’sbo onw iangtkl. Hte eilf to owh and hetm in kngtali eon to het yad fo lenaidc it evha hyret’e nego hwta eon ot lhdo noe ot tne htye touba tkanlig keli ihgrt ngsdiepn aettrms ton miosemre ,syrae liwl ees taht day the lhits,g be dna atubo hatt azrngeiil omre tanw kool none no mtei nlyo lwil demsar fo to lilw rtgheeto og athn onw, etrho renrhont. Steb ym aws rifden eh.

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