feeling...

Peaceful right?

feeling... sharp. dangerous. full of attitude. which, I guess, is just what a girl about to go to college ought to feel like. When you, future Anna, get this, it'll be ten years from now, and the passport that you got today will have expired. How was going to school in another country? Was it far enough away from your parents? What prompted past-you to write this (besides the fact that the trusty sketchbook/journal has gone missing) is the fact that, among all of the suitcases you were looking for in the attic today, you also found a hefty dose of family history. History from 1840. A picture of the family goat. Hand drawn sketches of the cottage. Letters back and forth between two feuding families. One family claims its daughter was starved to death whilst visiting the other. The other family is outraged because of a false arrest upon an unfounded accusation of THEIR daughter being a member of a house of prostitution. All insults and accusations in flowery, minute, faint 1840's penmanship, of course. I don't even know what the point of this email is. I just think it's weird that on the eve of your departure to distance yourself from your family, just when you're feeling incredibly independent, the attic delivers. Now, past-you wants to stay connected, be Bess's great great great great granddaughter, add her own tale to the many family stories. Past-you wants to stay in the attic forever, reading the family history. But I guess that's why college is good. So you can get the hell out of that attic and this house and make your own history. Go on.

Epilogue

3 days later

Ten years ago, I was a senior in high school aching to go to college as far away from home as possible. I wanted to see other countries and make...

Ym own reoisst. Eftl utb eleav t,i taht dtie lepndna — eitheygnrv saw to as nnotulmmae dna ohluefp ot vene i eflt ko i meoh. My eboref oinngep iwgns liek estongmih pu ueruft was em no. .
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Ti’s imosmsete wdno but n,gaia ouy nac arycz nwok rfueut ocsle epidw acn vseli be teh dan woh our away hw?ta. Net hrtoguh tbu i ago seonls enritwt nstmoh okwns nynaeo siht swa 0022 lelw eftar how beeofr eht deliv that isx ttepyr uobat ahs tteler nleaerd ,lewl atht, asrey. Ngadosdei saw — hbotrre dna i ym hiwt cencra.
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Hrgti huoeng ,ysa mlasto heert to hs’tat. Tihw tnhe the tiwh nad vayutelenl neev lehp ot ktgina artef gto sarey i fof thugho eenrv hiinesdf wef xnieeepc,re a den i in echmo mih yiaplct eb geoelcl het. Tlod tdeatavdes ot in or tgo iehwl onu,rtcy phypa gecl,loe loecegl eb ogelcel aronhet og ttha i tndteanig reso,emim to eb evern ae-ayten-org i’d eakm eevn my or fi i lefs ycaiplt. Eotrhrb ot ssol of eelo-elcgoph eht ym crapoemd eht seom btu i of is onw know lsso usrhoapom taht giontnh.
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Ym ierfentfd at lkoo smseioemt 18 sefl leef reh reay yeeotmlplc rfom i nda snpoer ekil dlo a bkac i. ,senuirve laperlla namiieg i btu ni teiginsx fo ioesutd htne imte hre eserhewom a. Ttelre ot adn in r,oldw etg itgsnti gwrtnii ehr dan tauob intawgn elfi ttha tihs eh’ss erhte wyaa sattr. Sr’obehtr nad tino dan innagdewr icusm adn eht aslwk a,rt essh’ ecoisko nad ehre’ty no utoab gnogi dwno ktingal nda for nteh own utjs niakgm tstngii nda oofrl her rdseinf and ,omro gganuhli oghtetre dna. Lwil gneaizlir ermo ot niecald seary, dya ynlo life oen lwil ti lwli onen okol aevh etrtasm higtr og eogn batou keil to ,tlghis the ot in fo teim who tath erhe’yt be gtiknla on egisnndp eht eon noe amedsr trnoehrn gotrethe the ten hnta ees yteh lhdo dan ot w,on atwn obuta ot fo athw tno kgailnt ady emioersm htem atth rohte nad. Aws ym btes rndief eh.

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