A letter from October 12th, 2025

hey olla,
im so anxious these days i rlly need to get back on fluoxetine. today i had tiramisu from wholefoods. when you read this and can drive get some van leuwan ice cream. idk im kinda thinking either caramlized banana honey comb or strawberry matcha flavor. it makes me feel better about not having my license since you'll have it. i really hope you have a boyfriend now. did you lose weight? i hope you're 125 lbs by now. rn im 160 so it should be pretty easy for u to lose 45 lbs by then. should i mentally check out till then? im always teleporting in time. well its only a matter of perspective. when I feel present it feels like i skipped a **** ton of time. are you gonna go straight to uni or cc? if so which one? itll be april when you get this. april is a pretty good month always. how many tries did it take for u to pass your road test? am I still alive by the time you get this? i have this weird thing where i cannot imagine myself dying, so i rlly never think abt it. i don't really know what else to talk abt. everything is so boring. i don't have any friends here. i wish i did. i feel so lonely and all.sometimes i worry if my appearance is the reason i dont have friends.  i don't think im that ugly though. i saw a rainbow the other day, it was really pretty. i haven't seen one in a while