A letter from Jan 16, 2025

Dear future me, my favorite show is Rick and morty (though I dont watch it often anymore), my favorite colors are pink and green, my favorite movie is thirteen, favorite video games are outer wilds and final fantasy xv. I have a good relationship with my parents, I got straight A's during the first quarter of freshman year but as the end of the first semester is nearing, I'm not doing so well. Lots of c's and b's. I'm pretty lonely, sitting by myself in Brandaus room most of the time during lunch, besides when its A days, then I sit with Camila under the stairs. The friend group I was in at the start of the year, I don't really know that well anymore. Occasionally Ali and Clark will invite me to sit with them, which cheers me up a bit because I know that they dont absolutely hate me. Marielle doesn't talk to me though, she said she doesn't want our friendship to get any closer so ever since then I've distanced myself from her for my own mental health. Cause that's my goal in most friendships - to get closer. I still down know if I have a crush on Ryan or not, I'm stuck between just keeping him as a friend or if I want to chase after him, I don't want to disappoint my mom though because she probably feels like we're connecting through talking about boys. I've completely blocked Olivia out of my life, I don't want to know anything that's currently happening with her or who's been interacting with her anymore because she doesn't even really exist to me atp. I've been getting into astronomy lately, my favorite planets are HD 189733 b, WASP 12-b, GJ 504b, and TrES-2 b. I want to be an astronomer or astrophysicist. I'm hoping sometime this year I'll find friends who make me feel like I matter and include me rather than being the second choice. Hopefully that'll happen by the time you see this. I think I have autism or ADHD or both btw but idk so pls tell me u asked ur doctor dude I'm gonna flip if u haven't