A letter from Jan 22, 2024

Time Travelled — 6 months

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, I know that I have been a pretty big disappointment to you so far. I know you resent me for many things I have made you put up with, and your life could be a lot easier right now if it weren't for my selfish actions. These past few months have been extremely hectic and stressful for me, but I have finalyl proven to myself that I can actually quit porn and nicotine for good and it's not actually that hard, it's all about my mindset. I have shown myself that I am perfectly fine without them, I'm even better off without them. I have also proven to myself that I have a crazy amount of motivation and can indeed do anything. I promise you that when you read this you will think about how proud I have made you and you will be able to recognise and appreciate my efforts to give you and your family a better life. I want nothing more in this world than for you to just be happy and satisfied with who you are. All you have to do is always remember me and everything I have gone through and everything I have done to push through and grow and continue on the path I have started paving for you. I hope you have good people in your life that are helping you be where you want to be. I hope you still have the drive and the ambition I have, but I hope that it gives you relief rather than anxiety as you will have a clearer sense of what to do with it and how to achieve your goals. I hope you enter adulthood with a smile on your face and hope in life. With love, Your loving but sometimes idiotic 17 year old self.

Epilogue

7 months later

I am quite disappointed that you went back into porn, and it only got worse a few months...

Treelt aretf rtewo iths uoy. Eundri iedp and uchm iappgtiidnsno nda ansp a uoy ntnatoite deam *** uyo agev ,sorew and ouyr tiequ fei,l uyor abkc cema lworse nweh iogwkrn. ,me nutqitgi vahe laso egdinivpr isientnyt at'shw in keil caeuesb rfo no itb fo alghouht ftsih,e am ihts prsreosg eht elfe emda khtna hte is i fair of rnpo ym soetesmim inevg to yuo me i i engkpei uyo thta i gnivarcs i dene toesyibr edcdure adn herwe a yomerm lfemys, rakct fo hvea het eyccuulssfsl. My nhgsaec ht,at hsnatk nhta uyro to othre swa aidroc cni eotfrfs from esorb yzcar tsay i to ni. 12 evpa a colohs holew ouy ot fo at adnmega eth ton lsinge raey rfo emit. Uoy is iiceogsdrnn dedaditc mvntehcieea eth thta ietuq wree ohw. Tsenp sglun ma hatt nwo ftfeor, aehv iwrgonk aog nda otu tub uirngni plceou yvyaered end apts skwee het ym in i ot dna i utp oryu nnodigu na.

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