A letter from February 1st, 2023

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, Hi. I just wrote a lot. I replied to my past self, but I also wrote another letter today that should be delivered on September 9th 2023. I am doing homeschool right now. I hope you can remember those awful feelings from January-February 2023 of crying myself to sleep without my phone and being so miserable. This is the worst time of my life. By a mile. I have never felt so depressed. I am planning to go on antianxiety/depressant meds and I am seeing a psychiatrist tomorrow. I tried to overdose a few times. I lied to everyone about it. Then I thought of jumping out of the balcony. I hope 15/16 year old me is over those feelings. I want to become a better person. I hope in three years from now I’m thriving. I hope I am still alive. If I am, I am going to ask some questions and although I won’t be able to see your reply, and take your advice, I want to be able to reply to myself, in the sense that I really can take the advice before even reading it. First question: how does it feel to have no braces. I’m not insecure about my teeth and hate them and want new ones and what not, but I don’t love the braces. My next questions is this: are you still reading? Not just reading for school, but openly buying books and reading them to fall asleep. I just finished flowers for Algernon and it was really good. The next thing I want to know is are you writing? I was thinking about either making a journal, or just a full on book..or maybe even both! I wanted to call it Mentally Fat. Because, I am, In fact, Mentally Fat. I thought it would be just about my life and the struggles since kindergarten. It could be similar to flowers for Algernon, with fake (but real) progress reports as if they were starting from. My first day of kindergarten all the way to where I am now. I could continue it for a few years with the “progress reports” and see how it turns out. I hope you follow through. I want to be someone when I grow up. Not necessarily famous, but I want to make a point in this world, and grow up to be really smart. I want to be a lawyer and graduate from Northwestern university or UPenn. My next question is how are the dogs? None of them died right? (Hopefully) Any new ones? Who is working for us as help? I cannot imagine Christina is still there. A really important question coming up..What school did you end up going to? (I am going to give a brief warning that there will be a bunch of popcorn questions starting right about..now.) Did you leave after 8th? How did you manage to stay in school? (If you didn’t get kicked out) How is hockey? What do you consider your “main sport” as of today? If you didn’t leave after 8th and stayed for 9th, did you make varsity club? How was commencement? Were you field hockey/hockey/crew/any other sport captain? Probably not hockey, but I am expecting field hockey. This text question might trigger a weird PTSD. No more mental hospitals right? Especially not Charlotte Hungerford I hope. Were you Mr. Przygocki, Mrs. Giese, or Mr. Greens prefect? How is Charlotte? Who are your REAL friends? That’s ok if you have none(which I don’t expect you will) but right now I have none. And that’s okay. I’m dealing with it. My trusted adult right now is Allie Molner. I am happy with that. I already wrote the conclusion to this letter but I want to edit it and ask a few worldwide questions. Have you moved houses? Have you gotten a new phone? What new phones are there? Any pandemics? Have any family members died? I am going to end the letter now and I imagine you are not thrilled about that, but I encourage you to write one today for it to be delivered in just about 3 years or so, and make another one next month to be delivered soon. Also, when you write back to me, please make it long. Although I will not see it, I feel that you will respond in a wholesome way. By the way, have you blown up on tiktok? My recent tiktok of Dallas just got like 500k+ views and I am VERY proud. These are really fun, and emotionally therapeutic too..be good, xoxo Georgina at 12:34pm from feb12023❤️

Epilogue

about 1 month later

Hi. It’s been just over three years since I got this letter. Some answers:
No braces is great! Got them off over a year ago.
I don’t read as much...

Omynera. Llatoi ofr dgnaeir lhsgien. It tub ielk fro adn ti oolhsc cikped si ti sooo i.
Wreti tnd’o i. Lla ta.
Rea ine,f odsg aclutlya. On oen ddei. Shtmon a few ujegd ftel gao. Ihtnk altcyula ago mhtsno nvsee i. Tgo drite omm of mih. Yuo neotinm ynufn scitarnih. 2024 hse lfte ni. Lhewi ubcnh i eohwl amntreett was we ni ni dha a ewbnete. Nad go nreamtett nt’idd i okwn ’dont thta! 22 orf omhe nstomh aobtu uyo wsa in oh oecn. Tigtnho flt,e is itrhnaics ecgar nomgci uecaseb abkc rou gtnrteinise asw heosrpeeuek ohw espvroiu ulaactly t!grih. Ouecpl ash tnihk seyra eehr neeb a rof sha a. ’hess oodg.
Netw i oeedn,ntim sa i teamttren to. Mdelid dalest form hte to 9th of taht ht7 mddlie fo. Nad ot fro for ni ttnilo wne a ealve het liyuleatmt 0,1ht eht fo a dha me sdteatr fetl tlphaios dah ot atptemt riahsmeph the duiiesc ni ubt soloch tres i kewe th9, i os whchi netw. Snuiof rsfit kewe fo ti …chools !ellw ho het was own at ’im. Irglenna dya ’ist het noe htta tcyi eno on dose in a ohscol. To cbrih ggnio ntxe pblybaro ’mi aeyr,. Anme ot uyo eewr i luwod eht gpsankei onw ouy gtrih emrmrebe if. Tewn rheet hicalre. !yaer roujin wwo. Too il’l hitnk sneiro htere aeyr i eb. Styud my ni ot dad wastn em cearfn. I nthki ltil iawt oeclelg lil’. Celgeol l!goeecl. .
I bcka uboat eth eernv caesbeu esuisntqo nwte eysrum gerarddsiign.
For sa ot tesady tulni uldco eray in as saw ohutc egadr iwht go s’bbay her oemh eturrend ewnh i enemnmomtcce and t9h i it ddi i salt i nogl ausceeb. Saw enfi it. Inec it yoeree,nv tub awadkrw a i tlltie sesug egsnei saw. I ignod henw yesurm ftel otsrsp i toppdse. At i telsa 3 oykech hkint onw todn’ asyre e’vi fro padley. I wokn. Eb yu’od rylaopbb cesodkh. Reac dtn’o obatu sawanyod dsue be i sesug to ponieasast it, i tub i. Hykoec dsia leaev tbu fdlei slat tstedar oschol ot i adh sa etsebperm i. Het heitr amon for dyelnma arey itnscapa dna osiern were. Erhte nbee nad veah aw’tns i mona me ubt dwuol ti. Bbya em ldot. .
Ssaolpiht eanlmt. Dtps on. St,dp eerrgtdig ubt lelw eys im’ otn. Ot ni i eevnr cbka cncceotiutn hc thplsoia ewnt. 5 iev’ i or i enbe iths 6 to own tweor ntikh ecsni. Os viean wow i aws.
No fceretp. Httloarec si nfie. Omtecnemecnm to tewn swa i ehwn ysbba’ in reh enuj i. Lduoc i ggaiartdnu a vlbeeie ’eshs in euolcp tn’ac oyu ??hmston just. Hnikt raye klie amr ehs i hekcyo hre idfle oebkr dirugn alts. ‘24. Egner up rm autcgh hwti. I he misesd ownk me. Udclo tlle i. Of vi’e asw just gtnoet eifl oelrd on trpa si ti i dsa ynseolht, as vongim btu zeridlae. And tt,ha otdn’ ujst did os imh i aubto i ntoef inthk. All ta alauytlc. Ok st’ath dna. Im ok.
Euossh nto ahev oemdv.
Nwo 17 ogt eiophn 1,6 eth.
Mpeacdsin no.
Aym eddi tgera gmdrana atls.
I eht egnndi to’nd ea,hy tsrelet dnim thta. To etiwr owleh eomr vhae flei ym i.
S’gyer nad bsaeeuc ton wtangchi ggoni to inceotun won tewri yatmano ot m’i i tnaw was bcka htirg dna. I i tbu oyu buaesec nkwo me wedatn to idd,. Gvie i wath say earperpd a dan i dna eb ceoms ntex pu loudc and ucekbl fesl rof ym wshi atps guh. Nihtgno annriwg telitl einc tbu a me, uoldw eaebcsu evha eben oclud reaeppr. I lc,yluata yrae kiktto wolb idd a up no gao. Rfom as ,eteamrntt kloo sh,ighdnti was the i in lngiiv abkc tspa i i ocne tog in bcka. Adn fo asw ltfe wngor ostr iarelezd ,up oyernvee bnedih i i hda. Mrfo eikl reay odl 0232 13 a. It elaizer i ’ntidd nda uinlt erya lrtea a. Nda gtignet 0222 i ym dna of urtecpi mrfo ybdra ebmererm noe perfoli home ggcinnha i to. Was 2502 ti. Ingntoh but i fo i hda tpoohs ahd on elsy,mf. I aw’stn idnd’t mnoerya 2202 ti dna eelrzia. Had owtutih oplpee on em dvoem. Rhguo taht was ynwsa,ay. Idd it a ittkok i kwor i dtire ouecpl ntikh to rvali ismet adn go on. Inhtogn tuohgh zaycr. Lol tgo the kchdae ctocanu dllsaa. ’sti kehracs incha yb but run tills semo up in. Tbu i tis’ t’ndo nfuyn nhkti tosp yhte. Ywa ,wctei akyo ro rwhee neuviesr eb lalraepl isth a eethr sutj ollyu’ ni tath yeo’ru sihgnt okwn drnieag si hpanep fi semo. Uto it lwli you emak nda. ’ndto btu ollu’y oyu yuo illw ehrew eeiniydflt smeti it uto, be rehte kame wlli kithn. Ddi how adn i od i onk?w ecsebua it. Of i of ym otu the tmise ilef ti adetksr pesetde edma. Wno rithg peerfct ti otn si. Lla ta. Oen not bti. Ehav sitll lggesutrs nmya i. Hatt atwh veah eon otok tub it to fro i gelarutf eratgdn, won rof i m’i i at do ponit nowk ont eesabcu and od. Si so fiel aycrs oooooso. Htrut eht t’si. Btu vgnmi,o ryfsleuo narduo oeppel ,og nppha,e tesgigb jtus btu ecom is snolse vi’e dan csikt olny vere ot caeeubs liulymttae, pkee anrled,e otncu gsnthi the ahev is eth you ot sronpe atth on uoy and. .
.
I loev ouy.
Giginns off.
.
55:3pm ,h6t hmacr o,raggien 0622 -.
💕.

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