A letter from February 1st, 2023

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, Hi. I just wrote a lot. I replied to my past self, but I also wrote another letter today that should be delivered on September 9th 2023. I am doing homeschool right now. I hope you can remember those awful feelings from January-February 2023 of crying myself to sleep without my phone and being so miserable. This is the worst time of my life. By a mile. I have never felt so depressed. I am planning to go on antianxiety/depressant meds and I am seeing a psychiatrist tomorrow. I tried to overdose a few times. I lied to everyone about it. Then I thought of jumping out of the balcony. I hope 15/16 year old me is over those feelings. I want to become a better person. I hope in three years from now I’m thriving. I hope I am still alive. If I am, I am going to ask some questions and although I won’t be able to see your reply, and take your advice, I want to be able to reply to myself, in the sense that I really can take the advice before even reading it. First question: how does it feel to have no braces. I’m not insecure about my teeth and hate them and want new ones and what not, but I don’t love the braces. My next questions is this: are you still reading? Not just reading for school, but openly buying books and reading them to fall asleep. I just finished flowers for Algernon and it was really good. The next thing I want to know is are you writing? I was thinking about either making a journal, or just a full on book..or maybe even both! I wanted to call it Mentally Fat. Because, I am, In fact, Mentally Fat. I thought it would be just about my life and the struggles since kindergarten. It could be similar to flowers for Algernon, with fake (but real) progress reports as if they were starting from. My first day of kindergarten all the way to where I am now. I could continue it for a few years with the “progress reports” and see how it turns out. I hope you follow through. I want to be someone when I grow up. Not necessarily famous, but I want to make a point in this world, and grow up to be really smart. I want to be a lawyer and graduate from Northwestern university or UPenn. My next question is how are the dogs? None of them died right? (Hopefully) Any new ones? Who is working for us as help? I cannot imagine Christina is still there. A really important question coming up..What school did you end up going to? (I am going to give a brief warning that there will be a bunch of popcorn questions starting right about..now.) Did you leave after 8th? How did you manage to stay in school? (If you didn’t get kicked out) How is hockey? What do you consider your “main sport” as of today? If you didn’t leave after 8th and stayed for 9th, did you make varsity club? How was commencement? Were you field hockey/hockey/crew/any other sport captain? Probably not hockey, but I am expecting field hockey. This text question might trigger a weird PTSD. No more mental hospitals right? Especially not Charlotte Hungerford I hope. Were you Mr. Przygocki, Mrs. Giese, or Mr. Greens prefect? How is Charlotte? Who are your REAL friends? That’s ok if you have none(which I don’t expect you will) but right now I have none. And that’s okay. I’m dealing with it. My trusted adult right now is Allie Molner. I am happy with that. I already wrote the conclusion to this letter but I want to edit it and ask a few worldwide questions. Have you moved houses? Have you gotten a new phone? What new phones are there? Any pandemics? Have any family members died? I am going to end the letter now and I imagine you are not thrilled about that, but I encourage you to write one today for it to be delivered in just about 3 years or so, and make another one next month to be delivered soon. Also, when you write back to me, please make it long. Although I will not see it, I feel that you will respond in a wholesome way. By the way, have you blown up on tiktok? My recent tiktok of Dallas just got like 500k+ views and I am VERY proud. These are really fun, and emotionally therapeutic too..be good, xoxo Georgina at 12:34pm from feb12023❤️

Epilogue

about 1 month later

Hi. It’s been just over three years since I got this letter. Some answers:
No braces is great! Got them off over a year ago.
I don’t read as much...

Yaornem. Isnghle loailt idagnre rof. Ofr dna it csohol is ubt ekli idepck ti i sooo ti.
Riewt i od’nt. Lla at.
Latlaycu aer dogs nefi,. Noe deid no. Fwe a oga fetl ugdje thsnom. Nsmhto tnihk i evesn oga lycutaal. Mom tog eirtd imh fo. Unnfy meotnni yuo rstichian. Esh in telf 2024. Ihewl mattrntee dha i ni hwoel we bcnuh was enbetew a ni. Sotnmh h!att asw uoabt neco dd’tin you orf adn go ’ondt mohe ni 22 oh nwok i emtarentt. Beesacu si was ttohnig acbk eseekheopur chnaiitrs sittienegrn t,fle tir!gh gcaer lyualtca uvoeisrp woh rou ncomig. For a itnhk been esrya a sah oulecp eher ash. Sse’h odgo.
Ot i etmeatrnt as i nteen,domi netw. Taht fo 9ht imeddl teh ot th7 eltdsa dlmeid from fo. Ieuisdc me nda dha ttempat chhiw i in ubt ilhtosap wen tres taesdrt het elyulttami hsmehripa evlae ot for het eth fo hlcoso in ltotni a h,9t a lfet ewek fro 1t,h0 dah nwte ot os i. Eth srfti ta now ewke !wlel was …sohlco fo ho mi’ ti sfniuo. Het in oohlcs galernin atht st’i icty odes neo noe a on yad. Irbhc ot brlyobpa ayre, mi’ iongg xten. Apgsinek were to erermmeb mnae eht i ouy onw thrig uoldw if you. Cehilra nwet heret. Y!era wwo runjoi. Isenro i ’ill arye eerth inhkt oto eb. Me rfeacn ym add in yduts tsnwa ot. Itll l’il ikhnt olceegl wait i. Cll!goee elelogc. .
I umysre inadedgrsirg eht cbeesua atobu went verne qsnetusio kacb.
It i in ybba’s her eemtonccmnme hutco i ryea ihwt tasl aws ot th9 dertuenr yetdas lcoud go graed as ofr i as ddi ongl euaebcs nad ehnw itlun oemh i. Einf aws ti. Lteitl akrwwad btu env,eorye aws senegi ecin usgse a it i. Enwh eltf rptsos ersmyu i digno i epdostp. Onw rsaey ’dnot ev’i eltsa at rof 3 peylad i oyhekc itknh. Ownk i. Esdchok obaylbrp eb o’udy. Arce t’dno i btu to yadwsoan aotbu sude essug apisaetosn eb i i t,i. Deilf tdaestr chkoey btu disa i ahd as lvaee i ot emptsereb hloocs ltas. Rfo arey ihtre mnoa psaainct and eht eamydnl ewre oresni. Neeb dlouw ti nt’was i me ubt nmao heav adn there. Ltod me aybb. .
Haoipsstl aemntl. No pdst. Yes m’i lwle ,psdt not but idergretg. Ostipahl twne to akcb i in evner tonccuictne hc. 6 htis to enbe ev’i i rtewo nwo i insce 5 ro ktihn. Ineav os i saw oww.
No rtcfpee. Infe is raothletc. I in jneu a’sbby i mncmetmceneo saw tenw ot hre wneh. Dcluo tusj ’sehs nt?oh?sm ouy i ni artugnidga cta’n bvlieee a leopuc. Cyekho tlsa tnikh i eilk arye dunrgi ehs hre amr idfel roebk. ‘24. Rm ihwt rgeen auhgtc up. Me esdims i eh nowk. Tlel i oucdl. Utb diearelz ti vei’ asw of as igvmon i is ads sjut tpar flei lrdeo no h,eoytnsl ngtteo. I ddi him so sujt hktni ta,ht and feont i tuaob o’dnt. Luyclaat at lal. Dan ko a’tsth. Mi ok.
Eahv sehsuo evmdo tno.
Het noheip 6,1 got wno 71.
Ciandspme no.
Etgra atls adrmnga aym iedd.
I dgneni eht esltert eahy, htta mnid ontd’. To hleow life evha reiwt i moer ym.
Cuaebse to asw own awtn not gesry’ retiw akcb gniog to adn taoynam i’m nctiuone ightr i aitghnwc dna. ,idd dweant em eaesbcu uoy i wokn but i ot. Peerdapr ghu my efsl ysa be etxn ldouc swhi mcoes dna vige pu a astp nda i i dan fro bcekul wath. A rnanigw ghntoin aveh eaeprpr but ,em ldwuo sacbuee udclo ttllei ncie enbe. A i up on aog lbow did ala,yutlc ttkkio eray. Hgtinsihd, t,raetmnet psta i glnvii wsa kacb orfm eth onec ackb in i i ogt kool in as. ,up wsa flte eeoynvre ehbdni zaeiedlr nrowg of osrt i i had nad. 2302 dol a 13 elik mrfo eary. A ti ’dtdni ltear and tnuli erya i eiaerzl. Ot i i fo romf nda noe efpiorl rybda nda eurptic 2220 emho eitggtn ebrmemer hacgnngi my. Saw it 0522. Otihngn i dah ptsoho lye,msf no dha i of btu. It in’dtd eairezl 2220 romenya wan’ts i nda. Loepep on dah em ttuiohw evmdo. Asw ttah gohru aaynyws,. Emsit ddi lceupo tkotik it on work a ot i alriv i dna iktnh itedr go. Czrya ngtihno uthgho. Lol tcacnuo eth otg echkda ladsla. Esom urn btu ihacn llsit akershc s’ti ni up by. Funyn tosp i btu hyte tod’n tnhki tis’. Rethe ni roe’yu uyl’lo si eb taht ihts awy sgtihn msoe ustj or llrlapae erehw nowk fi aidngre ieeunvrs ie,wtc ephnpa ayko a. Uot yuo lwli it and eakm. ,tuo o’ulyl iwll tnikh weher iemst lwil ti ereht ’tdno ouy be mkae etiyifnedl tub ouy. Uesceab owh nad do ti n?kwo i i idd. Teism it trskdae dteeesp mead of uot eifl of i het ym. Erfctpe si own irhtg it otn. At lal. Not bti noe. Ehva ynma gstuelrsg lilst i. Rof aedgtn,r and won ont eno od thta tahw vahe ptoin i od i kwon to at utb ofr sbuceae ’im ti i took ruletafg. Ilfe soooooo so is arscy. Het tutrh it’s. Oncut elpepo eggbtis haev peke you lytilamtu,e v’ie nserpo tjus vomi,ng dera,nle the ttha olny on nad uoy to esucbae to ubt nitsgh ,ppneah coem si is kcits rudnoa oufyeslr btu nda o,g eth nlssoe vree. .
.
Uyo evlo i.
Ginisgn off.
.
:35p5m - ,ht6 6022 noggreai, cramh.
💕.

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