A letter from Oct 2nd, 2021

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, I am so proud of you at how far you have come in the last 10 years. From where you were at the age of 20. Having a baby, in an unhealthy relationship that was abusive, to unable to finish school because your priorities weren’t straight like you thought. To a lot of partying and living. You made a lot of great memories but hid a lot of pain. Right before turning 30 you wanted a healthier version of you. You took your mental health serious and put in work for yourself. Continuous therapy, dealing with your depression/anxiety, letting go of friendships & relationships that are not serving you. Creating an atmosphere that is healthy for you and your babies. Being more present for your babies. For your 30’s you have set the Intentions of peace, love, and happiness. To be a better version of yourself. You have left a relationship, which has been painful, but to make the Intensions you set for yourself to be true. You have realized life is too short to be Unhappy. & all through your 20’s you were Unhappy. The best version and happiest version of yourself will reflect in your boys. They too will be the best versions of themselves. I hope you have kept your goals in vision and keep knocking each one off of your list. Because you are capable of anything you set your mind too. You are strong, resilient, admirable, a leader, a loving mother, and a wonderful friend. Hold on to the people who fill up your cup when needed and don’t forget to keep filling theirs up as well. 💜 Love always, Me. You have grown so much from 20 until 30. Keep growing & glowing!

Epilogue

over 3 years later

Dear Me,

I need you to pause for a moment and really take in how far you’ve come because I know you don’t give yourself enough credit.

Life didn’t get...

Klie lygaacilm ti cneo oyu ireesa would hdepo. Yw,sa iheaerv in ,ftca ti ni tog nmya. Twehgi ’ndot klta uto oautb of ekbstsa,c eppole ahtar,keebr dlou yeouv’ idkn teh nooiletam rerdica ttah most adn oouiscfnn,. Rehe uyo tey tslli rae dna. Rtgnyi tsill. Ti eenv hsrut tisll wnhe eebtrt, iogoncsh.
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Tuafulbie hte hist ogtrbhu toni es,ray tpsa oyu fevi onehart olrwd life ni. Etmhor own rea yuo a rteeh of. E,vlo ncdiague how adn ,ftsyea ltielt ehret uyo olok nmaush rof ot. ,ayds mose ouy how yuo rome htme zleriae efle uyo itedesp ahtn ear igvign.
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Etsoihngm ednriciebl uaeadgrdt oyu ddi ouy -. Niefshid 22,05 etlf htwa nceo ni uoy ssmioeblip. Own to nosrevi ewa in opts ahd hse hatt fo duowl easry uoy ohw be ?gao fo ietehgvynr uoy.
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Eben mdae ackb orhtf het a ohthgu yuor ingaa ni reath enve hnptilroeais ld,eepy llpdue eesttd hsa to you vlaee has nda you tath ccioeh dna. Wtans’ a atht keanewss. A hatt rensghtt asw. Ohwrgt tath asw. Eflt even ti nad yuo rfyeolsu, swa nectriuan riieyntrgf onghicos wneh atth.
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Eefl i lsot nkwo yuo rithg wno.
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Elik yrou fo rvneiso eyv,ha esbt dateli,so pu nwko ’oueyr teh sa disk ofr efel ureolfys you adn sgownih tno i. Vgohnr-tei dna fele i htta dlocu iwsh ephpan hp,ayp uoy pu dna eref uoy gilenha lh,weo eawk ulcod just onkw.
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Tno swkro tht’sa owh tub sith. And atht mena gilfian oeyur’ oest’nd.
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Uoy ta nto oen abck ear suaerq.
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How hsa onw ooeenms oostl ear you. Waessarne. Eeixpnecer. Ieoranbuds. Opiderssne, egrieznoc ibdllyn uoy rhitg onw d,co ulod oryu royu inyxe,ta yeht fi ingaa sptuyod— ont yrou even dnlotrloec hmte yb noeam,ry egnbi ear yruo eelf.
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Not si lnie a rgthtisa aegnhil. ’sti mysse. Oslpo it. Ti asupes. Ersrtsta it. Eikl tyei,nhgevr uyo ’vyuoe smeomstei ubt uennod it anh’vet nad esefl.
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Era onamw erotw cone litsl botau that uoy nelrtseii you nrto,gs.
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Ly,ualact won erom tath oer’uy tahn.
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Giong alfl ikle wnok ot ceebaus efles it lislt paart htwa oyu dan ekep now.
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Ilarsvuv bdliergniu you leif fomr a trhut, of oyur tno place era.
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Kate ouyr weaoldl uyo tmei rae to.
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Ads teh lefe msea at dan hfloupe to etmi uyo wleoald are.
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Uoy are it ot haev idrfgue ont eldwaol lla tuo yte.
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Tstamer is ht:si hwta.
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Tirgyn era oyu.
Rae icgsonoh you rbteet.
Ear rhee you tlsil.
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Drupo somegntih eb si dna to fo htat.
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Oyu a eceftpr eisvorn of nede diks uoyr tndo’.
Tehy real a neo need.
Hagieln a oen.
Oen ngwigro a.
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Si ttah cyaxlte yuo rae nad owh.
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Peek iogng.
Nvee ituqe het dsya no.
Hvyea veen dsya no eth.
Ton neve eelf yuo niakmg eoyr’u klei rrgessop nehw.
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Seuceab oyu era.
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Gtiisnt yuo ernsiov redip -het in nad illw neo eadv—orn lilw het sposnicoma uyo bcak os ihst da,y oolk felsryuo neo flee chum at nnu,wkon fo nsgrtati.
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Otn rae otls ouy.
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Uoy in the fo era ceombing dldmei.
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Lvoe, thiw.
Em 💜.

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