A letter from July 30th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, How you doin!? well,the present me is all messy,unwanted and irritated I`m 16 and a month old now. You know how hard teen years can be , I hope you are okay cause right now Im not .Everyone is all judgy about all my decisions including my school and the course Im in.they made me doubt myself just cause i took commerce.ah!screw them. My friends too arent even trying to help me cope up with my lonliness.They are adding to the misery.My whole life is now a big WTF? Anyway if you are reading this STAY STRONG LOVE. Do not give up easily cause that is what I often do and I regret it a lot. I hope you are surrounded by positive people who might as well give you the importance you give to them;if not its ok .You dont always get what you want and in my case I never get what I want [Im hell of a Pessimist]. As per my plan you should now be in abroad studying Law and also have your own dancing blog [II think of me as becoming an incredible dancer] .I hope you are on the right path. You possibly remember your breakup with your bestfriend like that **** hurts like hell more than my love breakup.well I think about her every now and then.I know Im stupid.who`s your BFF now? lemme take a guess.A boy who wears glass and is the most handsome around.Hope Im right.[these are defo not my preferences ,its a wild guess I promise.] For the brighter side of life,Im still alive battling through a Pandemic. I will give my best to stay the same so that you can read this and idk get a motivation about how life is always a huge disaster and its not your fault . Let me give you some advice.Stay away from stupidity.Friends arent always there for you[sooner you realize the better ].Also not everyone you think is your friend.Dont let people take you for granted.LOVE YOURSELF.Things are gonna get better,believe me the thing you are worrying about right now and crying about it every night isnt even going to stay in your memories the after two years.You might even laugh about how silly you were.Time heals everything,EVERYTHING.Focus on your skin health ,Dont make me look older than I actually am.Lastly when you feel low, have some coffee and watch FRIENDS or Brooklyn 99.I bet youll laugh your heart out forgetting all the ****** things happening then.When nothing goes well in life,take a nap. CURRENTLY MY FAVORITE SONG IS EASTSIDE BY HALSLEY AND NIGHT CHANGES BY ONE DIECTION[HAVE YOU BOUGHT A TICKET FOR THE CONCERT YET?] Hope mom is happy and in great health.Keep her happy ,she is really counting on you.Dont let her down.Serve her right after all the sacrifices she has done for the sake of you JUST YOU and no one else. LOADS OF LOVE ,STAY SAFE AND STRONG.THE WAIT IS WORTH IT. LOVINGLY YOURS LAKSHMI

Epilogue

almost 3 years later

hii my very pessimistic self Lakshmi Aradhana

I am doing wonders after 6 years, I did get into an amazing college and the one you always wanted ya NLSIU Bengaluru....

Hnitgveeyr ad endgach isenlt mdaeus lla oatbu nicodies that ou'yll my esrtios one ad to ot lrelay be ielf. Ihgtr dna i iemt wsa me bene in siwe hwomose and ykucl laecp veah the zanaimg i doruna haev vyer ighrt ppeole i ndfsrei. Nda nkaltig to lehwo it swa i heca ospdpte iavkalam ighnt teorh hot a. Eikl sltil on gsoe ntsigya uoy i efil am dais nsrgto. Hainnec ot esacu niihntpres aysd yuo am oedrpi in pskpide dan i rondua rmfo a sday tow girntiw i reyv fo pg eb glreifa. Ochcateol od rtse atwh anwts em ot dan shit eta si etka odg. Yuo skwihres fro seary dnwo tca ish hmi had a tsal oh owt to i evlod os ,humc. I i issm me so iaang m,uhc phoe dnsfi lsilt he hmi. Tafc iserst eehppand ew so on ceyhrr os her htwi oermth os isth and steah now tnyigas ti ubt are ckba ucmh yaw fun teher ebt ghit?t fo rewe tnhe tsfa all edis iylamf i 'wdnotlu it ew lveo and eht hetm ielk asbmi otrmeh da iagan. Mte trrhebo tahts abmsi crrehy who liesk odgs useca and we. Eebn aayw ohtsmn dsasep two ago msiab 'nsath gtare. Nad styillgh tpryte mi' hlel' djuiner ikqcu a mhi angno b,yab snihut os abkc hmi tmee got uencob si spiutd eh oh go edtraope llac iinrspnteh eh i fatre upp os nuf aler si isht wen my ehster' eh. Yuo eht evli all ofr no emn o,sge orf leki atrsh, ewonm ese ofmr olyn gesus heva ayatkwea sfo,rleyu ilf,e ot tou, ad heesrt' tisdpu men eingrvethy eods wkro rae i evah uyo but i poecxetin feil aer rwhee rndoua leki tish hte. Gn rnfdie yoru nesawr onmwe lla i eithr si owh toqnseiu uoy lseas?sg kaoy asinompn,co iefsndr mi so erpishtta threei ym non **** btes be guy aevh nwta agter lkei are laem or amf to ot with. Finresd eaml i nda aer rlonam od who *** eahv. Eltrte kwon ctrurtenmie 'tlli yruo gnaai tou tsnur owh lil' rof im screda look ti rkow ot ietxcde see nda nda at uers so tnex l'li ,tou hmtno, ehsert' sola. Eth pu eth rlgaer dan gevi cager ehva yuoelplfh to at ctureip i not olko natilytsn. Rsi kctite but ogsn ddi 0202 by amf i og d1 i thot rbrm rncecot ym uby isth a nto we wolud ni tgulue a hwo ongs on inrnuoe v kadaehntla liwl mra nda avhe i si irfaevto rof cerntco lprbobay nr nda da to fun ad no. Htem are coynabl eth ish aepny dedo' :(( eltoh rthee ffo fo tsju wno nad 4 mali eidd. Eeksp a (ahd lsse??ty tshta znya os ouy aesrnso eh's evern rryha si ,man a i artgdhue reylla wtignhor cusnrsyeaen soal uyo taht hhcwi ta a fof athw sheda ikeld hda ima afri rouy klie tbu boker iggi cpki now us)ltgerg ihs??t? heafrt ielk w. Lla wthi his ad scimu stioc i e**-*r arryh yesslt dsreeale oelv eteclnyr ecahrp cyaloasilnoc esh' ilslt ksis otteng itm,e cree,ar and ikgn wen a osidc baulm more. Nuf been tol vhae i a shiabr ieaavdh kgnissi. Do seeht fsefc,io i tno i igetgsb yhw memont work job do utsrusip ionrcamt od nda tlsli i ugingfri hte tetalas ugh iekl to are oeisrwr ni nhgsti otu nto tehn my ym ta mi twan da. Ot do bluenavaial konw men gycnir noigolk tgihr it ondrigenp ltisl obtua nto tis tbu dna uoy fo **** earsvc i hadvaei ont ta yuo wtah em htorw im tpra. Mtrohe si time elfi on fne,i segt eht eenrvs is chsu ym ubt all. Kay yeb. Dan lky evah nfu slhal i.

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