A letter from May 7th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Hi *****, I've been dealing with this for a while, and I just need to talk with somebody about it. I think that I may be Lesbian or Bi. I've felt this way for a long time, but I've just ignored it or told myself I'm 'confused'. My parents are homophobic, they were raised conservatively, and I don't want to talk to them about it. They don't know yet. The church at ****** is really open-minded, and I just need some help working through this. I don't want my parents to know (at least not yet), so sticking with e-mail would be good. Thank you for being there, ***** That's the letter we just sent to our pastor. If not now, when? Sure, it's Coronavirus. Sure, I'm quarantined in with my homophobic parents. Sure, I have absolutely nowhere to go and no resources to speak of. Sure, I'm currently sitting in a closet (really) crying. Sure, I'm mentally probably not ready for this. But, if not now, when? Wherever you are, good luck. And I love you. And so. does. God. -You a year ago

Epilogue

2 days later

Hi dearie,

Well, it's a been a year, that's for sure. A long, 15 months of March with life transformations packed in to the brim.

I suppose you'll...

Want na apeudt. . . ,ma d,neeid uxpaansel be to rueeq, iscipcfe i. Hmston iynoabrnn oahtern adn ro rfiueg 5 lwe,l hghuto okto to thta tuo 4 sa. E,no veha nda onspuorn a legtins o,nw se,rhf erohiuap ewn vieg eth dna regedn em nemucebenurd a ritfs i atht ewn aulcat for naem temi.
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Het swa mmesur. . . Swa eth lafl oot lngo, adn. And to twe,rin neth eth ym itwh tmei rfo vlie ntesrpa aecm and ot nreurt. . . Tn'did i. A notactsn on wkee fo orfm tmeh tuo lcsla came ot apcin ned thm,e dna a i of tfle srhu rhiet tnfiarc rle,fei nda ehtn. Dpee rsleafu except adn msuidrndgnseitan em ,pdee ot and. Trh,ee dneps y,mcnpoa whit itreh sdantei duofn ot nshomt brsemme ,os emso dnt'di rurtne dan cksut veil ilmyfa i ot sifucontfga wtih. Lvolye and bnee st'i.
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Dceptexe aevh uyo snihtg as vhea aym rothe teslryec echdgan t,oo. Fro tno ciwhh i a ym a nraihstic estwe oareymn hresadt mdi),n dgo's rpaeticaep is ouh(tgh oevl in oefftsr cristniha of ym saw epek od yoru athw aprt tpseanr m'i ot. Aveh than ormf yfle,sm i sidfeh,t olyhgotuhr (neev ehva im' nto ni ymna yan atwh used bnee i saec, apy)hp tsgnih nad wleih hwo ihpearp ot b,e erve htat esagerndt ewhn dna vdpedoe,le adn i still ndfi.
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Smeo 'mi tfu,eur ni sayw orf eth lephouf. Aepnlt oasl poeh hwleo scitisiepsm the adn as a hte fo nda uobat usiaonx. ?igrht sgrinfe eco,dssr.
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Atainidovl a,paccncete to ackb nda my siendgn dear ouy, o,evl.

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