A letter from May 7th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Hi *****, I've been dealing with this for a while, and I just need to talk with somebody about it. I think that I may be Lesbian or Bi. I've felt this way for a long time, but I've just ignored it or told myself I'm 'confused'. My parents are homophobic, they were raised conservatively, and I don't want to talk to them about it. They don't know yet. The church at ****** is really open-minded, and I just need some help working through this. I don't want my parents to know (at least not yet), so sticking with e-mail would be good. Thank you for being there, ***** That's the letter we just sent to our pastor. If not now, when? Sure, it's Coronavirus. Sure, I'm quarantined in with my homophobic parents. Sure, I have absolutely nowhere to go and no resources to speak of. Sure, I'm currently sitting in a closet (really) crying. Sure, I'm mentally probably not ready for this. But, if not now, when? Wherever you are, good luck. And I love you. And so. does. God. -You a year ago

Epilogue

2 days later

Hi dearie,

Well, it's a been a year, that's for sure. A long, 15 months of March with life transformations packed in to the brim.

I suppose you'll...

Na atnw putaed. . . ,eqeru ied,edn eb feccispi ot xunalseap ma, i. Otok as shonmt dna 4 hrneoat otu ro ughoht 5 tath yobannrin ot urefgi w,ell. Wne steilgn iveg actalu irtfs i rdgeen tath het ofr eiauprho me new and a mite a mena fs,ehr w,on psorounn nad ahev neo, bmdneneurceu.
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Swa eth emsmru. . . Wsa adn log,n oto het lafl. Eacm rfo and to atrnsep irnewt, nda ot miet ehtn my ruentr het wthi levi. . . I dit'dn. Rile,fe tnricaf tuo i a rofm mthe, and fo llacs dan a thne shur acipn den no tstacnno to mthe emca ewek fo heirt flet. ,eped tsdmrdnignaeunsi ot and deep nda me cptexe ufelsra. Rutner d'idtn i to evil esmo ailfym nshmto onufd einstad ot itwh fuoaiftncgs embresm o,s psedn ierth o,manpyc and eet,rh twhi utcsk. Lyolev 'its enbe nda.
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Sa strlceey uyo hvae rhote oto, may pxecetde haev gcneadh tnshig. Asw hatw ffesrto tdhrsae hhwic nto mdi)n, riectpapea aresptn fro gdos' o(thhgu cihnatirs to i'm setew rpat i od my a in ym keep hctarnsii a yuro nyoerma fo evol is. Veah nad i pap)yh who bnee in e,csa tlils hrepipa hthulgroyo oedeelvdp, ot i ,be aymn uesd yna i ,ethifds im' and dan athw ehwn otn eevr lhewi atnh ehva nev(e that morf ,lysfem dfin snhgit negdrseat.
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Oems ehoupfl etfu,ur ni fro the mi' sawy. Inxaous dna loas as epho and the csitsipmise wlohe a apletn eht of abuto. Grti?h sdo,srce senrifg.
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Kacb aerd ym ,lveo uo,y geninsd aivolnitda dan to eaccencta,p.

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