A letter from May 7th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Hi *****, I've been dealing with this for a while, and I just need to talk with somebody about it. I think that I may be Lesbian or Bi. I've felt this way for a long time, but I've just ignored it or told myself I'm 'confused'. My parents are homophobic, they were raised conservatively, and I don't want to talk to them about it. They don't know yet. The church at ****** is really open-minded, and I just need some help working through this. I don't want my parents to know (at least not yet), so sticking with e-mail would be good. Thank you for being there, ***** That's the letter we just sent to our pastor. If not now, when? Sure, it's Coronavirus. Sure, I'm quarantined in with my homophobic parents. Sure, I have absolutely nowhere to go and no resources to speak of. Sure, I'm currently sitting in a closet (really) crying. Sure, I'm mentally probably not ready for this. But, if not now, when? Wherever you are, good luck. And I love you. And so. does. God. -You a year ago

Epilogue

2 days later

Hi dearie,

Well, it's a been a year, that's for sure. A long, 15 months of March with life transformations packed in to the brim.

I suppose you'll...

Na tanw apeudt. . . E,erqu iedn,ed scpecfii eb to m,a saeauplnx i. 4 rnoteha frugie otu koot as oaibnrnny ro thta dan ot 5 l,wel uhgtoh hmotsn. I nwo, ahve rhiaeupo eiltgsn ndbueueemrcn for me itme tfrsi dan atth dan aatucl nema uprsnnoo oe,n endegr a wne frhes, gvei het ewn a.
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Saw het rseumm. . . Swa the g,nol nad oot flal. My etaspnr whit ot meit maec thne veli to and the fro nad nruetr ,rietwn. . . I di'dnt. A nfactir nhet tuo ht,me i a threi cinap ushr tmeh adn kwee fo ee,ifrl lcasl came dne on and rofm to onsattnc of left. Epde, me eafusrl and eautnirisnnddmsg to epde adn eeptcx. T'nddi ancigffsuto ot to msebrem alimfy stdinea ustkc tere,h i senpd omes thwi wtih dan mtnhso trruen so, vlie fdoun rieth conpyam,. Nda s'it oeyllv nbee.
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Exptcdee yuo ctylesre o,ot heva yam hotre nsigth sa dngaech ahve. Ght(ohu inticahrs ratp efrofst is to my in gso'd stewe nsterap i olve whhic do m,nid) reatdsh ym monyare a rtpiaapece hawt orf ekpe a otn im' itcrinhas was fo yruo. Veha tedesnarg dfin periaph who ,be nmay vee(n haev sitll thta ni isgthn stfide,h used ihwel phpay) nay i'm tnah fm,slye e,cas dna eedove,pdl nto dna fmor i eenb i ehwn awth i eerv nad ot holutorhgy.
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Eht asyw in lfohpue i'm for emso ,fuuetr. Lenatp hwole of nixuaos uabto a nda osal ohpe sa pmsitsiecis eht and eht. Srinefg irth?g seodcr,s.
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Cnaceec,tap loataniivd kcba ot u,oy iegdnns ,elov and erda my.

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