A letter from March 24th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Dear Future Me, i hope you're in your dream college today and everything is not in quarantine. Also hope you're able to read randomly thousands of books, watching endlessly tv-series and hear your parents how much they can't wait you to come back home to İzmir for holidays. I just checked the part i wrote now and i realize how formal it is smh.(göz deviren emoji burası) Whatever, everything is not so perfect right now, i am hoping to study more hard the rest of my last 3 months to THE exam in quarantine, make better results on denemeler and going to win an excellent university ve allah rızası için şaşırtmak my teachers be. Valla geri kalan zamanım için 12. sınıfım çöp olmuşa benziyor, mezuniyetimi bile görmeden ve balo elbisemi giymek için zayıflamadan koronadan ölebilirim ya da en kötüsü zayıflayınca bunların hiçbirini yapamayabiliriz. ALLAM LÜTFEN 2020'de EXCELLENT ÜNİVERSİTE YARABBİ. Nys. -öhöm- For now that's all i can say and i really really hope you're feeling soo beautiful and actually are, comfortable with yourself cause you showed your real potential abilities actually to yourself and so happy (cause i need to be right now), that you forget your 19th birthday because YOU ARE SO **** HAPPY TO REMEMBER. I hope i laugh at the situation i am in right now in your day, show this e-letter to my new friends or recent ones to make them laugh and be even more happy. Also, maybe you're in contact with Beyza, Rabia, İclal, Yaren and Gökçen. Maybe you're not. Maybe you met Asude again. Maybe you lost one of them. It doesn't matter, try contact and thank the rest please. Even if they don't know it well, they made your life better in so many ways you know. If you don't, know it. Because your life wasn't so easy (maybe because of your thoughts or the situations you're in) and won't be easy at 18 if you're alone. Make 19 better for yourself. Eat sushi, secretly hate it. Drink as much as you can. PLS CHANGE UR STYLE. Learn a new language. Improve yourself. Try everything you want. Don't dissapoint your 8-year-old-self like i did. Please love yourself. Don't push to crush even if things go wrong. Kendine de iyi bak, soğuktur oralar. PUT SOME CLOTHES ON LİKE YOU SAY. Burası pek soğuk olmaz, alışmışsındır. But make a snow angel for me and the 6 years you couldn't. Smell this message, i am sooo sure it'll be smell like cologne from my quarantine days. HAPPY BİRTHDAY. SANA LOTS OF DEZENFEKTAN YOLLUYORUM, METRO TUTAMAÇLARINI TUTTUKTAN SONRA KULLANIRSIN. Değerimi bil. byü.

Epilogue

almost 4 years later

Dear past me,

Somehow, in 2021, I didn't reply to this letter. I think it was waiting for me to answer it today.
The horrendous days of quarantine ended in...

Rexal acn 01,22 yuo.
Ruo tadrtse iṁriz ni we ot dmevo ot'nd reay saecueb emaon,ry levi lcyauatl i lecolg,e iastbnlu̇ sapretn eth. .
To ,tnhig kntike gto teh ıdızyl ni 'eesrh so,oo oyu. You nhapep het not isgnth eevn igamien but ot duolw swa ti ni. . . . Eerht ye'our in ggaulsnae isduytgn. Athw? dlranee yuo oyu nowk hefrcn adn.
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Emisl go uoyr uyo iwrte oyur in dsa ot hwti ormd no 'yroeu mrpo ormf going utb acfe ihts ot eacnfr moor uotc'dln a teh.
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Boeva as teh iknth wthi sa funereqt of oyu 'ruoey ont in nay mnsae anctoct. Eon eevn olst yuo fo hmet. Atth :) edesgus ihrtg.
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Iwedngd in to da,rmrei go ulo'dtcn oyu uyo cbs eht tog erayn fcnrae rewe.
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Caelp uni to lailċ si fei,n lesco sah a she. Roesht bset hte ehca fo hte heetr smeo uin eht owt uoy of that uoy hetm oitn w'uodlt easm ssgue dya iwht tdl'oucn be btu ogt nfrdie oyu.
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Si önçekg dogo. Ednrte uheos ulğam ni a ehs. Tsdiseu iwth reeht kuutt ehs. Mtee uyo ihm idd'tn utb eyt ,rrsyo. Tub smoe oecls dya.
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Zi̇rmi stsueid in aarbi. Ouy oeryu' oldnu'tc her ntoacct iizṙm trfea tog eveal see btu aaign in ouy to.
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Lautcyla lilw yda seaud yuo see oen. Uoyr bet lliw stih a ndim iegbn blow i tacf. Ehtes cmgoni you ese know i ni'ddt.
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You ̇nulbtasi uaobt uoy dcol ihgmt ti wehn kaglint reew i wonk be isda nda. Dsai i calep tnti'dd yan dan su mena, but yuo atht lepilyfccsia eadl eveelib rhee. Hiwt eerzngif rzeo an rternhno eetahrw the edrnu ot afcnre. Ni to cebeusa tw??f?? cnefar os enric ni eb hcmu ldco nda 'tsi.
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Papehn sgrleugts. Hety easyr 5 in tlsa hte ehpedapn. Nyam ar,dh hda erwokd eolepp hwti nyam uoy nedswbokra eitdrfl but aynm oot. You tub wetn fo dna tlso to crdei rehite tpiasre lsot yuo. Oyu otu uoy asd fo to htiw lncuotd' dbe eadm best ntocury teohrna got ouy efidsrn os also eon fo plpeoe me,miosset tbu eovmd yoru. Dan hre nkow ot'nd vnee know aa?ign hawt ouy yuo yte. Is even in hsti ni uyro ont amsre,d hgi?rt.
Rhwot otbua as ti eontahr 'tdon i ebscuae tdn'o owkn you rtonyuc ingog to trsouit a itnhk enev oyu. .
S,i the thwor you tnihg ti. Lveo llyo'u tn,ikh htan elsoufry eenv ouy rrwoy emro t'dno. .
Ssoiatdpni oury tddin't eedieblv eilk s-y-la-e8defolr oyu yuo. .
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Gsseu vyer uoy iredt adhte hsis,u uoy it ll,bcpiuy i. Trfae aern esbaeuc 'oddnalcsm to eht hte uyo sihsu thta phso tewn. .
Aelr as noos negal elsctho msoe no kmae tpu sa nca a i nwos chtki il'l o,yu rof ftrae i. Nac iensc lsle hree uolvntaiyrl (:> ltisl tehy em eerh emsll the ihtw aols i bceeaus ti t'odn i gcnelo,o it hrubogt.
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And lla,tsy wsa 91 dgoo. 8 ta wne dmae insfder 91 uoy. Kile too did no yuo eon ehty esel eehldp. 22 yroeu' si 32 n,ow lsceo. Riepvmo lief tllis oreuy' aubto try ot rfouelys ouy're inmagk refs,ndi enw esllscue itlls dan. Tfel, much btu ttahs' eyrv stom ovy'ue ees teh tihng yu'oll eulpsibla eerv.

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