A letter from March 24th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Dear Future Me, i hope you're in your dream college today and everything is not in quarantine. Also hope you're able to read randomly thousands of books, watching endlessly tv-series and hear your parents how much they can't wait you to come back home to İzmir for holidays. I just checked the part i wrote now and i realize how formal it is smh.(göz deviren emoji burası) Whatever, everything is not so perfect right now, i am hoping to study more hard the rest of my last 3 months to THE exam in quarantine, make better results on denemeler and going to win an excellent university ve allah rızası için şaşırtmak my teachers be. Valla geri kalan zamanım için 12. sınıfım çöp olmuşa benziyor, mezuniyetimi bile görmeden ve balo elbisemi giymek için zayıflamadan koronadan ölebilirim ya da en kötüsü zayıflayınca bunların hiçbirini yapamayabiliriz. ALLAM LÜTFEN 2020'de EXCELLENT ÜNİVERSİTE YARABBİ. Nys. -öhöm- For now that's all i can say and i really really hope you're feeling soo beautiful and actually are, comfortable with yourself cause you showed your real potential abilities actually to yourself and so happy (cause i need to be right now), that you forget your 19th birthday because YOU ARE SO **** HAPPY TO REMEMBER. I hope i laugh at the situation i am in right now in your day, show this e-letter to my new friends or recent ones to make them laugh and be even more happy. Also, maybe you're in contact with Beyza, Rabia, İclal, Yaren and Gökçen. Maybe you're not. Maybe you met Asude again. Maybe you lost one of them. It doesn't matter, try contact and thank the rest please. Even if they don't know it well, they made your life better in so many ways you know. If you don't, know it. Because your life wasn't so easy (maybe because of your thoughts or the situations you're in) and won't be easy at 18 if you're alone. Make 19 better for yourself. Eat sushi, secretly hate it. Drink as much as you can. PLS CHANGE UR STYLE. Learn a new language. Improve yourself. Try everything you want. Don't dissapoint your 8-year-old-self like i did. Please love yourself. Don't push to crush even if things go wrong. Kendine de iyi bak, soğuktur oralar. PUT SOME CLOTHES ON LİKE YOU SAY. Burası pek soğuk olmaz, alışmışsındır. But make a snow angel for me and the 6 years you couldn't. Smell this message, i am sooo sure it'll be smell like cologne from my quarantine days. HAPPY BİRTHDAY. SANA LOTS OF DEZENFEKTAN YOLLUYORUM, METRO TUTAMAÇLARINI TUTTUKTAN SONRA KULLANIRSIN. Değerimi bil. byü.

Epilogue

almost 4 years later

Dear past me,

Somehow, in 2021, I didn't reply to this letter. I think it was waiting for me to answer it today.
The horrendous days of quarantine ended in...

Can xrela 21,20 you.
Rtadtse acsubee tn'do ot ruo i tnaṡibul talulcya eivl year hte ece,lolg deovm we maeroy,n in iizrṁ rtnpsae. .
Yuo in o,soo tog tiknke nt,gih yızlıd rehes' to the. To tno migiane ahnpep eenv uyo aws ni udwol tbu tsgnhi eth ti. . . . Esganagul ndysuigt ni o'yeru eehrt. T?ahw you you lneerad oknw adn rhcenf.
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Ryuo liesm ruyo rfmo ot dsa uc'ntlod on inogg oyu er'oyu a tshi to rneacf eiwrt moor ihtw utb afce mord ormp og teh in.
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Smena evboa het ton of hwit sa yuo ikhnt as in eutnefrq o'urye coatntc yna. Oslt tmhe fo eevn oyu one. Gitrh ): sgueeds tath.
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In ,demrair otg uoy nerafc ayenr og ntldou'c the rewe ddniwge uoy cbs ot.
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Fein, eclos inu a to is caelp li̇cal seh ash. Eht uoy sema tath n'dltuco fo uyo with nefdir yad fo ebts hte utb o'dtluw ache yuo eth temh gsesu wot htrsoe tog etehr nito meos iun eb.
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Is ogdo ögçekn. A ni sehou amğul nterde seh. Uesdist utkut reeth hitw hes. Yet rryo,s n'ditd uyo mtee tbu ihm. Seom tub oecls dya.
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Stiesud ni imiṙz aaibr. ̇zrimi uyo tub uyoe'r leaev erh ncatoct ese to dtc'nolu angia yuo ni tgo terfa.
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You daues lwil ualtcyla ese ady oen. Ebt uryo owlb iengb i iwll atcf htis mind a. I dit'dn ese mocgni wokn uyo sthee.
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Tlgnkai aisd nwhe ldoc nokw oautb ghtim eb nad you ti i uoy were alsṅuibt. Tnd'tid htta said elcap eeevbli us scpyaiellfci oyu en,am i utb dna dela eher nya. To neronrht roze cfaren hwit threwae an zeniferg erdnu hte. Dna racfen f??t?w? 'sti be cdlo ot nriec baseceu in in cmhu so.
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Nphape stgregslu. Tehy 5 lats in the eadnhepp arsye. Dweork htwi anmy kbrneswado oto nmay hda elopep uoy aymn tbu ldfiter ,dahr. Uoy uoy eircd olst ewnt ot erthie dna sertpai tbu tols of. Ot maed tbse otu twih of lsao crtouny sad of so aontehr uoy s,emitemso you meodv bed tog iednfrs eoplpe yuo neo ubt yuro outcdl'n. Adn nowk nd'to ouy owkn twha angai? eyt ouy enev erh. Ihtgr? shti ni oruy mr,easd enve ont si in.
'ndot dt'on eanthro i oyu wtorh vnee it tnhik ocyurnt nkow a gigon yuo strtoui eaebucs touab to sa. .
Is, ti nihgt eht wtrho uyo. Tnd'o neev moer oylursfe nhat orywr loev you olu'yl nth,ki. .
Tntdd'i oyu a--flyed8l-osre blveeide ruoy sntsaodpii uoy ikle. .
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Uyo thdae uyo uss,ih lui,lcybp dtire i yevr segus it. Hussi lcdmnds'ao seabceu to het teh htat uoy spho entw erna atfer. .
Lear ptu fro as oesm eamk snwo as lhtecso nsoo tkhci tefar i i a lneag uo,y il'l no can. Seucabe it it slel me hyet the acn ond't coel,ogn slmel isltl hburgto ehre ollriaunvty i ncsei i saol erhe (:> iwth.
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Ogod 19 asw yas,tll dan. Dmea 19 yuo rnsdief new 8 at. Else hety neo you did dlphee oot on ikel. 22 32 oscle won, is ruye'o. Rye'uo slecusel isllt animgk sin,drfe efli y'roeu lstil ot veriopm ytr new buaot and loeryfsu. Ha'stt msto but uyol'l ever hignt 'oeyuv ees uhmc ,tlef eyvr the ubepliasl.

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