A letter from January 14th, 2020

Time Travelled — almost 2 years

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, So today is the big day, the big 30! I guess when I was younger I had a set image of what 30 was supposed to look like. I would look to Jams and think, one day that’ll be me. Married in a home, with 2.5 kids! Of course the lord had other plans. Life never plays out the way WE want. It’s down to God to determine these things. These past few months have been a crazy whirl to begin with. Today I’ve received 3 important emails. 1 from Nia listing the last pay they’re giving me (which happens to be peanuts). It left me infuriated, in total I gave them 4 years of my life. 2 volunteering and 2 being employed. And during those 2 years I experienced and survived so much. But the end lesson is that I survived, Alhumdulilah I made it through. Soon after I received another 2 emails. 1 from WGN (my new work place), listing the docs I needed to bring in for my DBS. And 1 from Zohra at the MYH for me to come in and meet the team. Alhumdulilah I’m truly grateful for when one door closes... and I never expected all this. Lol I’m still single AF at 28. I’m sure he has a plan for that too. These past few days I have felt a little lonely but sabr is important. I know he will have someone special for me waiting. I hope the 30yr old Seeni isn’t still single. I pray someone is stood there with you, by your side. I hope and pray your heart and soul have been healed. And that you’re warm, full of gratitude and have a renewed energy for the decades yet to come. On the 10th Jan 2019 Sanna reminded me that it was exactly a year since our trip to Kenya and our incredible safari trip! Thinking of Kenya gives me goosebumps. Alhumdulilah there are always incredible times to be had. Just work and pray towards them. These past few months have taught me there is good in life. There is always ease following the struggle. A newly turned 28 year old Seeni is sending all her love and Duas. I hope life has been good. And if it’s been tough, I pray you’ve had the strength and support around you. Just like you did this past year. But always remember to be kind to yourself, you have become an incredible woman. Love x

Epilogue

18 days later

lol life is a funny thing isn't it?
So it turns out I grew leaps and bounds professionally. Found a work place I absolutely loved, with the...

Uslso stmo ebdierlnci. Eceiernepx acepl my rokw ehwre was dna a dgornseice wkro darh. Otmorped os mcuh so wsa i. Hte a erwe cof ew tetill utb nbrtu hnet lal out inaepcmd nad hti. Nda ujnyore teh lvaee idiceson i ifcluftdi ktea ot ewn a ddeidce dnfi ot. Teh ,oaky i tahw iefl staht aevt'hn aobtu is tllis asitdinteon but tath dharece. Baby ss,ept eohrt eth oen frate ntigka llams eht.
Oson i vleo a in ni wrntite eratf the tme yeldep nda si ahd 2020 i lfel hist i oiryn rteetl nma. Ysa ym uclod tfirs you. Eedp ti wsa ensietn nad adn mwra. Dimn itnd'd onirfm he me eh sih hgcdean liaseer dan slouhd. Ew whoel eth aengrni uor 1 ar,ye rvsraniayen eyra os wnet. Rfo magarr,ei lpasn gdasikrdn adn etdeilda mdae disk a. It pafniul saw. Pnaulfi nda ycebdlinri tuc eepd. Aedm i the help i ti ruohhtg utb and neddee gousth. Promiser ihtbgr of ot uajryna winnkog it made ttha all i ht41 22,20 i of iftuuaelb dah omginnr illh vsdeurvi tpo dna 0th3 ta on my sodot eht it i. Osneyjur ekep kin,tag tbu tigsf atsht eceervi hwat dan hte efil sotm ew and of, risssrupe tncsssio llams epltc,moe hogtnni is clirenedbi ew. .
Tlso i but amy heva nierbciled eindfr leov enw most i n'tieltapo' mte a big teh. Esvli, eedden loss ni hbot rtnhoae thbo terdffine neo our irxeicpngnee we selvle fo. X tbse iftg ebne hte 'tis.

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