feeling...

Peaceful right?

feeling... sharp. dangerous. full of attitude. which, I guess, is just what a girl about to go to college ought to feel like. When you, future Anna, get this, it'll be ten years from now, and the passport that you got today will have expired. How was going to school in another country? Was it far enough away from your parents? What prompted past-you to write this (besides the fact that the trusty sketchbook/journal has gone missing) is the fact that, among all of the suitcases you were looking for in the attic today, you also found a hefty dose of family history. History from 1840. A picture of the family goat. Hand drawn sketches of the cottage. Letters back and forth between two feuding families. One family claims its daughter was starved to death whilst visiting the other. The other family is outraged because of a false arrest upon an unfounded accusation of THEIR daughter being a member of a house of prostitution. All insults and accusations in flowery, minute, faint 1840's penmanship, of course. I don't even know what the point of this email is. I just think it's weird that on the eve of your departure to distance yourself from your family, just when you're feeling incredibly independent, the attic delivers. Now, past-you wants to stay connected, be Bess's great great great great granddaughter, add her own tale to the many family stories. Past-you wants to stay in the attic forever, reading the family history. But I guess that's why college is good. So you can get the hell out of that attic and this house and make your own history. Go on.

Epilogue

3 days later

Ten years ago, I was a senior in high school aching to go to college as far away from home as possible. I wanted to see other countries and make...

My sstoire now. Adn — ot ko ti, lfte i but eelva tlfe pofhule wsa sa evne lumnonaemt ot gvinthyere i thta edit meho eadnnlp. Me eoebfr no up ielk uefutr nigenpo iswng ntgmeohis ym swa. .
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Eb uro ’sit ubt cna eilsv eht htaw? ohw dna naag,i oemisstem can dpiwe ywaa feutur yarcz onwk clsoe uoy wnod. Seyra tht,a but ahtt btuoa net tletre tsih wsa hhogtur eardlne lewl frate ixs vldie erptyt onneay 2020 le,lw eerfbo htsonm lonses gao tetrnwi hwo sha i knsow het. Swa erncac my nad — htwi i hroebtr ddgasenoi.
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S,ay eehrt st’ath almsot rthig ot oghneu. Isifnhde laticpy ouhtgh i gntika thwi ceeexirep,n eth cehmo dne evrne elhp imh eb in neth a wfe dan tog aeyvenltul i the eelolgc tfaer ihtw ot nvee ysrea off. Eoelglc eathrno og fi to mi,eesmor ro eb tednaitgn iyalctp to i gto ni lelgo,ce tdeteasvad ty,urnco aekm i’d even taht ahypp odtl or ym celeolg hilwe en-rygtoe-aa i veren eb fels. I my utb mhrpaosuo hte ghol-eepoecl ssol taht fo eht onhnitg nwo kwon etrbohr ssol si fo ot oems aecpmrdo.
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Elki a raye ta posren 81 lpylceotem my look sefl smsomeeit tfeenfdri dna kcba ofmr ehr i eefl i lod. Animgie nhet tiem of weeoresmh i oetdusi llpleraa nsiigetx ni a her vei,uresn btu. Trats trtele dna hrete ni yaaw wginnat istigtn ahtt to hist hs’es lefi hre tniiwgr lr,dwo dan autbo get. And refsdni dan scmui on ,atr dna ingmak dan gniog oom,r gisintt dan and hs’es uotab yreh’te nktaigl ntio and icosoek kalws ’tehbrsor rolfo rfo winreangd nad ngluiahg ondw tnhe rhe teh oehtertg onw sujt. S,hitlg emit rohnenrt esayr, the fo one woh lwli eht ouatb dan not lkoo eilf clained aedsmr in ehrtgote eno yeth thaw ent ot to statrem to veah ntha tath onen ,now h’reety nziegirla ielk eorimmse nwta agitnlk be hlod and ady irgth utoab algknti it ehmt see on wlli ayd of wlli og oynl teh ngeo one pnigedsn ot ot hatt ohert orem. Nfeird swa eh ym setb.

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