Time Travelled — almost 3 years

A letter from June 21st, 2018

Jun 22, 2018 Jun 21, 2021

Epilogue

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, So, right now, I'm sitting in Josh and I's shared bedroom in his mom's house. I just finished my first reflection journal for the first 50 hours of my practicum at SVC. I concluded this reflection by saying that I don't want to work in campus life. So, I guess that's something. I'm broke as fuck, in so much debt I could cry, and I'm not in the best physical shape. But I also have a family I love, a wonderful man by my side, and friends that mean the world to me. So, life's not bad. Sometimes I think back to when I was like 13 or 14-- did I envision my life as it is now? I'm so fucking proud of myself for the things I've overcome-- I have a college degree, I'm halfway through grad school, and i finally have a reliable mode of transport. I think little teenage me would be pretty amazed at where I am now. So, who knows where I'll be in 3 years? Will I be close to an assistant director of residence life position? Will i even pursue residence life as my first job? There's still so much uncertainty in my life, but I'm not scared of it. So, in three years from now, I'll basically be old. Just kidding. But I'll be closer to thirty. Which is when I said I'd want kids. How will I feel in three years? Will I have a better idea of whether or not I actually want to have children? I think I chose thirty because by that time I should know what the hell I want in life, right? I'll be more stable financially I hope, and I'll be ready to decide if I want to have a child. Who knows. I'm only 22 right now, not yet 23. On another note, I realllllly don't care about any more of my birthdays. Maybe 25 because car insurance or whatever. I guess I'm a little scared of aging-- It means losing touch with youth, getting more wrinkles, and physical deterioration. But even when I get this letter I'll still be in my twenties so maybe I should stop being so morbid. Okay, I'm seriously getting annoyed by myself, so I'll wrap this letter up. I guess this will be a neat little surprise in my inbox three years from now. Maybe I can do this again after I receive this one. PS thanks Pantsuit Politics for telling me about this. Hopefully your podcast is still going strong in 3 years. Or, ideally, Beth and Sarah will be running the country in some capacity. FUCK Donald Trump. okaythanksbyeeeee

Epilogue

about 1 year later

It's kind of a weird feeling to read this as a 26-almost-27-year old. I've been through so many changes in almost five years that I view my 22-year old self...

Aenïv i seugs ilwl sa npmacdie syrae htat a you own! ot llogba os + od fevi. .
.
Ym ihgh ma i soeprl:i weettersha ihtw ocsolh johs gnreol no. Ddcieed pu vhea ludco us of fo to ichhw astnhileproi amd-e- astl ibneg ned fro hol,ocs i my anlyfli niiodesc bset uor ni erya obth endde ugtdeaar i hte. Adn aphyunp ghottere weer we htgri biriednycl fro we orhet trw'nee tujs ehca. Btu i wlel avhnte' him epoh keonps hs'e wno in i to ongid hteer yresa. .
.
Rietnn d;irnfe meseoon bset wsa uycaallt ym nweh i oefbre won :ii etm yreas oilserp drremai rlwaamt asw eh ot ta ratp nda mi' i a ramgane an. No ngdiat hmi a gnhti het eegmassd ___" ormf iftrs amr"awl?t lcsicas eccnteodnre i ppa saw and we. Ym aslo ahtt rshepa in ndede a pu vsow dgneidw. .
.
Job i srfit of ma 3 nshifi btoua my )!!!( of hcolso ot ataegudr ayer out. Is atth a hte fatc llsit aepcedct sprseoc ayp iptsnoio elcrntey tneoahr mi' i ahtt tygrni fnnasitgcii sraie ot. .
.
Edn haah pu atknh fcta ;elfi not that edn wdolu i up npnapiegh in did odssgnoe ta ahtt i teh rincdeees otuhhgt. .
.
M'i ayw yha,e tser'eh oh ietm hgnvia noso on in lhle ayn iskd. Odne iths in do one cld,ih 'sti adn nemoo?c!y if i have a. .
.
Tuoba las,o tobau em one i yaoemnr rcea in:hgt my ghtri tsap wsa tnod' draybtshi. Temi evah het i old hlaf ot tbauo am woh i htikn. .
.
Em siht fo wrory is it tilsl ash to ang,ig tapr of ubtao eercbma atpr tbu enotrha me ygtrin. Scome age hhciw ady i ereyv ofr whit soidmw adn lief gfraeltu am nrexeiepec. Htaw a rluetgsdg of sa i me chihw i ecra to mmyleensi rgoyeun ntioce awomn ssel hnikt i ma tihw rehsto irtnstga batou atht. Teh ;tbi getniahc rnig"es to a at rae ertcne ol"soen ifle patneit wlil fi utb illtet ngbei i stveen uyo ptenita kcsu tslil ot let and me og mero eb. .
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Itsh ni svehmestel hoep hsit i nca ahtt rohtse aerd nad of trasp ees. Soem sa tymosl i emmensi rewe a ash pvmreido tteerl isnec nedxepcieer elif saltmo hsacegn ym evfi oy-a2-2lder ufiticdlf tsalvy 'eiv nad hgortw ym eorwt trifs tbu in etsim se;rya. Ceam wdluo it payl fiel tmlsoa soncediirpt i noe nda teur othuhtg adn weh(w)! out awendt wya to otu fo heots ufnyn how oenn nlpa my tis'. .

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